Once again, I have arrived at a point where my schedule is so jam-packed I can't breathe when I look at it. It's so overwhelming I'd rather do nothing than try to climb this foggy mountain. I've found it's a pattern now since I've been giving myself these 10-weeks or 90-days challenges at least once a year. And these are not challenges that will push me forward in completing a specific project. These are goals for completing multiple projects at the same time.
This is what happens when you say yes to everything. Since saying "yes" to something means saying "no" to something else, in my case I've said "no" to my mental health over and over again. And I could blame everyone else for my situation - I really could point a finger at the people who put me here - but it's really a matter of time management and learning to say "no".
So here's a quick summary of what's been going on:
I'm pursuing a non-funded PhD. I didn't get any scholarships to support myself, so I had to work part time (or full time some months) to pay the bills. I deemed working at a research project more suited for my needs than working, say, at a Starbucks, so I said yes when I was offered a job in research. And then another research came. And then another. And another. Thing is these projects don't pay well, so being in one couldn't even pay my rent.
Research projects take up almost my entire day. And when there's time, I work on my PhD. Also consider that assisting is classes and grading is mandatory for PhD students. No wonder I haven't finished yet.
I spent months working 13-hour days to juggle everything. And these hours don't include my writing, cooking/chores, exercise, hobbies, socialization.
Flash forward to today, I have decided I am not going to say yes to any project that isn't directly tied to my PhD (like a paper or conference for instance). By the way, I said my first "no" last week and it felt fantastic.
So this brings me to my new challenge. I've been trying to plan everything for the next weeks, till the end of the year, and it doesn't seem to get any clearer. I've created a detailed trello planner with deadlines, my google calendar is full of colorful blocks, my bullet journal is just overflowed with messy hand-writing, and I have a stupid white board reminding me of everything I have to do on a constant basis. So I thought, instead of spending another hour thoroughly planning everything from scratch until it makes sense (which it won't), maybe it would be more efficient to rely on the fear of public humiliation this time.
I'm all for accountability partners and I got a friend of mine to be that for my PhD progress. But what about the rest of my duties? With this post I overtake the challenge to do everything I need to by the end of the year, while my few readers can hold me accountable for it. In 15 weeks I will come back and post about everything I did and didn't do during this challenge. And I know most of you won't even bother calling me out for not managing everything as promised, but just the fear of humiliation is a motivating factor.
Since the work I do in the research projects cannot be compromised, I will at least try to compromise my working hours. I haven't decided on how many hours is ideal yet, but I suppose this is a TALK I should have with the supervisors and managers.
For my PhD I want to have finished my analysis by the end of the year and have a thesis outline, so I can start writing in January. Come January, one of the research projects will end, so I will have more time to focus on my writing.
As for my other writing, I have decided not to write another novel until I complete my PhD, so my goal now is to write a total of three short stories. The length doesn't matter in this case. They just have to be complete and concrete in 15 weeks from now.
Social media: I'll just have the simple goal to be as consistent as possible. 15 weeks also means 15 blog posts and 7 YouTube videos. But uploading book analyses on yt means having the time to read those books in the first place. I think it's doable, but I won't stress much about it.
Ideally, I would like to be able to exercise daily. If that's not possible, I'd say hitting 10k steps will count as exercise on my low days, but never twice in a row. A balanced diet is not something I compromise with, and cooking is something I do for fun, too. Also, for fun, I would like to draw and play the piano more often.
Finally, I have registered for a full ECDL course, which has to be completed by the end of the year.
Wish me luck!
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